Texts

New year’s at Yasuragi with Marvin, the person who’s always had my back. Let me pause here.

I had a revelation when I hosted a team event at work where we made a slide about ourselves with photos to show the team. It started with a person putting a photo of his wife and family. But it quickly grew to what felt to me like people feeling pressured to put the best moments of their lives on show - children, weddings, wonderful couple photos, running a marathon. Not until afterwards did I realize it reminded me awfully much of social media.

Horrible feelings came to me - what if somebody felt excluded? Somebody struggling and being forced to see how everyone else’s lives were perfect, worse, being pressured to talk about their personal lives where only the positive was allowed. I remembered myself in high school, when there was absolutely nothing positive in my life. I hated when a classmate would ask me “what are you doing in the weekend?”, because they would spend it with their family. I felt so nauseous I had to write to my team the day after.

Those of you who read my posts know I like to mock social media by using it for things others don’t want to talk about - mental illness, suicidal thoughts, etc. But I also post hopeful photos - me and Marvin, my cat. I thought it would give people hope, but didn’t realize it could also make people feel left out - people struggling but don’t have a partner supporting them. I thought of all the people posting photos of perfect moments with their partner - affection, weddings, and I felt like it is now on me to correct that myth.

Marvin has been my life’s biggest support. That’s 100% true, but far from the full picture. No relationship is fully represented by those perfect photos that dominate social media. Every relationship has struggles.

So this new year I wanted to celebrate our struggles, and all the work I’ve put into helping myself feel better :) I genuinely wish we’d acknowledge each other’s imperfections more because that’s what makes you love someone - their imperfections. That’s what makes you love life - for the ways it’s imperfect but worth living anyway. Happy new year, I look forward to 2022 :)